Click on the Chapter 13 button above to view an entire sample chapter. Click on each chapter heading in the table of contents below to view a sample question from that chapter.
Chapter 9 Family and In-Laws
Chapter 13 Physical Appearance
Chapter 14 In Sickness and In Health
Chapter 15 Divorce and Re-Marriage
Chapter 18 Previous Romances
Sample Questions
Chapter 1 Household Chores
How often should the dishes be done?
[] 2 or 3 times a day
[] every day
[] whenever we have company coming over
[] whenever we have time
[] whenever we run out of dishes
[] we'll use paper plates
Chapter 2 Compatibility
When you and your fiancιe disagree about what decision to make (e.g. when picking a house), how do you plan to handle the disagreement?
[] whoever feels more strongly about the decision gets his/her way
[] whoever wears the other one down gets his/her way
[] if we can't agree, we won't do anything (the authors call this a veto)
[] my wife will make the final decision
[] I will make the final decision
[] we'll flip a coin
Chapter 3 Sex
If your husband told you what he likes and dislikes during sex, how would you react?
[] I'd say "great", and try to please him
[] I'd be okay with it
[] I'd be upset if there was something he didn't like
[] I'd feel like a poor lover
[] I'd retaliate and tell him things that he does that I don't like
[] I'd ignore his comments
[] I'd be uncomfortable talking about it
Chapter 4 Communication
How much privacy do you intend to allow one another (i.e. are there some things that you won't communicate)?
[] I want to maintain my privacy; I'll let my husband know what's happening when I think it's necessary
to do so
[] I want to maintain my privacy, so if something happens to me (e.g. at work) and it doesn't affect my husband, I won't talk about it
[] I don't want my husband to feel extra stress about my problems (e.g. work problems, health problems, money problems), so I won't tell him about them
[] I wont tell my husband anything that might hurt his feelings
[] I wont repeat gossip
[] I expect to be able to keep a friend or family member's secrets or confidences
[] I don't want privacy; I want to tell my husband everything and I expect him to do the same with me
Chapter 5 Anger
If you found out you were in the wrong in an argument, what would you do?
[] I'd apologize and try not to do it again
[] I'd give my wife a gift (e.g. flowers), but I wouldn't apologize
[] I'd pretend the argument didn't happen
[] I'd continue to deny that I did anything wrong and blame my wife
[] I'd initiate sex
[] other _____________________________________________________
Chapter 6 Children
How would you feel about having your child sleep with you and your husband?
[] no way; I want my privacy and my husband belongs with me
[] children need to be taught that there are some things that they can't join in and our sleeping arrangement is one of those things
[] it would be okay if it were only for a little while (e.g. if the child is sick or has a nightmare)
[] I would agree to it only when the child is small (e.g. 4 years old or younger)
[] I'd be okay with it if the child slept in our room, but not in our bed
[] I'd enjoy having our child sleep with us
[] I don't know how I'd feel
Chapter 7 Money
Will you agree to a certain amount of money that can be discretionary (i.e. your wife does not have to consult you about a purchase under this amount of money)?
[] yes
[] yes, she will have an allowance to spend, but she cannot exceed it
[] yes, we'll each have an allowance to spend as we see fit
[] no, we can spend as much as we want without consulting each other
Chapter 8 Careers
If something should happen where your wife's career really takes off and she earns a lot more money than you, how would you feel?
[] happy that my wife is successful
[] relieved that I'm not primarily responsible for earning money for our household
[] relieved that I won't have to work so hard
[] resentful
[] inadequate
[] angry
[] I wouldn't be able to handle it
Chapter 9 Family and In-Laws
When you parents get older, and require constant care, do you plan to have them live with you, if
necessary?
[] yes
[] possibly, if there were no other alternatives
[] no, my husband wouldn't be able to deal with it
[] no, I wouldn't be able to deal with it
[] I don't know
Chapter 10 Backgrounds
If you are not from the same ethnic/cultural background, how will you handle different customs?
[] I'll expect my husband to adopt my customs
[] I will adopt his customs
[] we will celebrate both traditions when possible
[] when two customs collide, we will alternate between mine and my husband's
[] we will adopt the customs of the country in which we live
[] we will not participate in any way in the other's customs
Chapter 11 Religion
How important is your faith (your particular beliefs) to you?
[] extremely
[] very
[] somewhat
[] not very
[] not at all
Chapter 12 Values
Under what circumstances do you think it is okay to take something that doesn't belong to you?
[] under no circumstances
[] if someone left something at my house and forgot to get it, I'd keep it
[] I might take supplies from my employer (i.e. reasoning that they don't pay me enough anyway so I'm just taking what's rightfully mine)
[] I like to keep hotel towels or other items as souvenirs
[] I might take something in response to a dare
[] I do it to get a thrill
[] I might steal to put food on my family's table
[] other ____________________________________________________
Chapter 13 Physical Appearance
If you were to go bald, would it affect your perception of yourself as attractive?
[] yes, women don't like bald men
[] maybe
[] probably not
[] definitely not; bald men are "hot"
Chapter 14 In Sickness and In Health
If you got sick for an extended period of time (e.g. several months) with a serious illness (e.g. Postpartum Depression, recovery from surgery of some kind), how would you like your husband to treat you?
[] he should treat me exactly the same as before
[] I'd like him to leave me alone
[] he should care, but not say much
[] I'd like him to listen to me vent my frustrations and anxiety, and he should sympathize
[] he should spoil me, trying to meet my every need and desire
[] if special care was needed (e.g. following surgery), I'd expect him to do whatever he had to do to help me
[] I'd expect him to hire suitable help (e.g. a maid, a nurse) until I'm better
[] I'd like him to call in a family member to help
Chapter 15 Divorce and Re-Marriage
Do you believe that divorce is ever right?
[] yes
[] yes, if one or both partners fall out of love
[] yes, if there is a lot of tension in the marriage
[] yes, if one partner or children are being physically abused
[] yes, if one partner or children are being emotionally abused
[] yes, if one partner is unfaithful sexually
[] only after marriage counseling has been tried
[] only as a last resort
[] I'm not sure
[] not for me
[] never
[] I wouldn't presume to judge
Chapter 16 Friends
If your wife wanted to go out alone with a male friend, how would you respond to the idea?
[] I would trust her and let her go with no objections
[] I would let her go, but let her know how I feel about it
[] I would object, but I'd let her decide whether to go or not
[] I would secretly follow them to make sure nothing inappropriate happens
[] I would come up with any excuse I could think of to interrupt their time together
[] I would be extremely jealous and tell her, if she loves me, she wouldn't go
[] I would tell her not to go (I'd forbid it)
[] my reaction would depend on where they were going and what they'd be doing
Chapter 17 Grief
How would you like your husband to respond when you are experiencing grief?
[] I'd want him to leave me alone
[] I'd want him to put up with my bad mood, but otherwise not worry about it
[] I'd like his constant attention
[] I'd like him to listen to me express my grief and let me cry on his shoulder
[] I'd like frequent physical expressions of comfort, such as a hug
[] I'd want him to be patient
[] I'd like him to take over some of my chores so my overall load is lightened
[] other _____________________________________________________
Chapter 18 Previous Romances
If you want to know about a previous relationship, how much detail do you want?
[] I want to know her name and how long they were involved
[] I want to know what she looked like
[] I want to know how serious the relationship got
[] I want to know whether they slept together
[] I want to know who broke up with whom and why
[] I want to know how I compare to her
[] I want to be reassured that I am better for my fiancι than she was
[] not much; I'd rather just get a general idea of what girlfriends were in his past without any details
[] I don't want to know